More Monster Jokes
Q: What is a sea monster's favourite dish ?
A: Fish and ships !
Q: How do you know if a monster has come around for tea ?
A: There are muddy footprints on the carpet !
Q: What did the monster want to eat in the restaurant?
A: The finger bowl !
Q: What did the monster say when he saw a rush-hour train full of passengers ?
A: Oh good ! A chew chew train !
Q: Whats the hardest part of making monster soup ?
A: Stirring it !
Q: What will the monster eat in a restaurant ?
A: The waiter !
Q: Why did the monster eat a light bulb ?
A: Because he was in need of some light refreshment !
Q: What happened when the ice monster ate a curry ?
A: He blew his cool !
Q: What did the monster do when he lost his hand ?
A: He went to a second hand shop !
Q: Why did the monster dye his hair yellow ?
A: Because he wanted to see if blondes have more fun !
Did you hear about the Irish monster who went to night school to learn to read in the dark?
Q: What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a wizard?
A: A Tyrannosaurus hex.
Q: What do you call a wizard who lies on the floor?
A: Matt.
Q: How did dinosaurs pass exams?
A: With extinction.
Q: What do you call a team of vultures playing football?
A: Foul play.
Q: What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
A: I love every bone in your body.
Q: How do you communicate with the Loch Ness Monster at 20,000 fathoms ?
A: Drop him a line !
Q: What is big hairy and bounces up and down ?
A: A monster on a pogo stick !
Q: What do you get if a huge hairy monster steps on Batman and Robin ?
A: Flatman and Ribbon !
Q: What time is it when a monster sits on your car ?
A: Time to get a new one!
Q: Did you hear about the monster who had an extra pair of hands ? Where did he keep them ?
A: In a handbag !
Q: What game do monsters play with ants ?
A: Squash !
Q: Did you hear about the monster who had eight arms ?
A: He said they came in handy !
Q: What aftershave do monsters wear ?
A: Brute !
Q: How do you greet a three headed monster ?
A: Hello, hello, hello !
Q: How do you keep an ugly monster in suspense ?
A: I'll tell you tomorrow !
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